Volunteer (Part 6a: Preparation)

Going to work over the next week feels very odd.  Everything is so normal, in contrast to the weird mystical world I'd recently stumbled into.  I answer emails, do sales analyses, go to meetings.  Yet at the same time, there is this unavoidable thread of strangeness, because my name has changed, and no one seems to have noticed but me.  My email signature at work reads "Stanza Doolittle, Sales Analyst", and most emails I get, old and new, begin "Stanza" or "Ms. Doolittle".  My business cards have also changed - not that I ever really needed to give them out.

It's a little frazzling at first, because I feel like I have to be constantly listening for my new name in case someone calls out to me, and if I don't respond I'll be identified as some kind of impostor.  But things seem to go well naturally, and I never make a slip, even when I introduce myself to a visitor, or on the phone.  By the end of the week, it's more exciting than nerve-wracking.  Even though everyone still knows me, it feels somehow more like I am an actress playing a role, only I can make the role whatever I want it to be.  I find myself becoming less shy, more outgoing, more confident.  This, my co-workers notice.  A few even compliment my appearance, and I accept it offhandedly, even while inside I want to react to this sort of unprecedented event by jumping around with glee... even if I don't really understand it, since I look the same as I always have.

Meanwhile, after work, I spend at least a couple hours every day with Julie.  There's some practicing, but mostly she lectures me on all the details I need to know to be a "safe and successful Sorceress".  I learn how to see and feel a spoken lie.  I'm no good at doing anything with them...lies are literally slippery, apparently...but Julie can tug on one of mine hard enough to knock the wind out of me or make me tongue-tied (thankfully not literally) for a minute.

She explains about "Open Conjures"...it's sort of like Fiverr, or a "looking for group" queue in an online game.  You can Vanish yourself and concentrate on your minimum terms, then if someone's performing a Conjuration illusion and you meet their criteria (for appearance or costume or whatever), out you come, and they pay you and send you home, much like happened to me by accident.  Julia says the money is so-so, about the same as working at Starbucks on average (albeit with much less actual work), unless you're in demand for some reason, or very accommodating about terms.  She gets quite stern about this...given how I was dressed and that I went in with no terms at all, apparently I'm lucky I didn't end up in a cage for some pervy Sorcerer with a pajama fetish, for who knows how long.

Or worse.  Even Sorceresses don't fully understand the place things go to when they Vanish...some call it the Between, or Elsewhere, or No-Place.  If you stay there too long...sooner if you've Vanished yourself...you start hearing voices.  Whispers at first, but they get louder and louder, and if you listen to them, you go crazy, or never come back.  It even affects animals and objects if they're left in there too long, though it's not clear how they could properly listen to anything.  The whole thing scares me, which Julia says is good because it is scary, and is why no one really knows much about it...any meaningful "exploration" would be seemingly suicidal.  It makes me a bit sad, because up until then I've felt so comfortable in Elsewhere...like finding out your favorite childhood blanket you've been using every day has actually been infested with spiders for weeks.  But I still resolve to get the hell out at the first hint of a voice.

I don't say Hell, though, because that's another thing Julie dumps on me...Hell is a genuinely real place, and there are real demons that occasionally come out of it.  No word on "the Devil" himself...if he does exist, he, at least, never comes out.  Nor angels, or heaven, or God...that's apparently just a big question mark.  She says some people think Sorcerers are descended from angels, but it's clear from her tone that Julia doesn't think much of that theory.

Demons though...they have similar powers to ours, and usually use them to look like normal people.  But they're pure poison...every interaction they have with someone subtly steers their life down a different, darker path.  Addiction, greed, violence...every bad part of humanity comes gradually bubbling to the surface when a Demon crooks a finger at them.  And like we can see a lie in the air when one of us speaks one, Demons can feel certain words, even over long distances.  The multiple meanings of the word "curse" aren't a coincidence.

From what Julia says, the main reason the human race hasn't completely unraveled is that there are, relatively speaking, so few Demons and so many humans.  Which is why they like to target mystically-inclined people these days, because even if we're more careful, we can do a lot more damage if we go bad...more bang for their buck.  For some Sorcerers, that's actually the end goal...get enough imprinted magic and incantations that you can turn things around and start hunting Demons.  Sounds very noble and heroic, except Julia points out that very frequently the successful "hunters" end up getting rich selling off the various Demon parts and fluids, which can be used to directly imbue objects with magic, instead of people.  The hunters that aren't successful, on the other hand, tend to be horribly killed or corrupted.

Julie tells me if you're smart you stay well away from that sort of thing, and I have to agree.  Everyone else, herself included, is mostly just looking to get enough power to feel relatively safe, and to make money in less dangerous ways.  Though not literally make money...at least a few people in the government apparently know about magic, and they're always watching for obvious things like that.

By the time Saturday rolls around, I feel like I at least know enough not to make stupid mistakes.  Though we don't further discuss the differences in how we feel when we are "being magicked", it's clear that I'm unusual in that regard, and that Julia is a bit uncomfortable about it.  Since I heard about the voices, I'm a little uneasy too, as I think I've become mildly addicted to practicing what little magic I know...it's basically replaced most other forms of "release" for me at this point.  But I tell myself I'm being careful, and if I see any harmful signs of addiction, I'll talk to Julie about it at once.  Surely that's safe enough...


In short order, she re-emerges.  She's wearing silver ankle-strap sandals with a medium heel, and has added silver earrings.  She looks stunning, and doesn't even spoil it when she chews her lip uncertainly.

"You're sure this will be okay?"  I give her my best reassuring smile.

"Positive.  The whole point of the Invite is it's 'all-inclusive', as it were, so you might as well dress to impress to start with.  And boy have you!  It's enough to make a girl-"  I cut myself off as my efforts at encouragement threaten to stray into uncomfortably unfamiliar territory, and clear my throat to cover it.  "Well, let's just say you're sufficiently impressive and leave it at that."  Stanzie actually blushes at the compliment, and I have to look away quickly, feigning momentary interest in the view out the window.

"Well, all right then.  Let's go make some magic!" she says after a moment.  We head down to my car, with only brief pauses for my Apprentice to grab her own handbag and lock the door behind us.